The Myth of the “Proprietary Marketing Process”

Agencies love to sell shiny, trademarked frameworks. The “blah-Method”, The “blah-Growth Engine.” The “blah-Funnel 360.”

And of course, these “proprietary processes” come with a massive monthly retainer — because apparently, someone reinvented marketing itself.

Here’s the spoiler: they didn’t.

If This Were Really a Breakthrough…

If this was a genuine scientific discovery, we’d see:

• Harvard Business Review case studies.

• CMOs stampeding to adopt it.

• Wall Street tracking it like the next OpenAI.

• Marketing teams scrapping their tech stacks overnight to switch.

Instead? It exists only in one agency’s pitch deck.

Where’s the Science?

If this is truly “proprietary,” then surely:

• How many PhDs did it take to create it?

• Does the agency employ in-house data scientists who publish peer-reviewed research?

• Do clients get to work with these PhDs directly, or just account managers translating PowerPoints?

• Is there a “secret training camp” where employees are molded like NASA engineers?

Or is it just: rename the funnel, add some buzzwords, and repackage industry best practices as “innovation”?

The Measurement Mirage

Most of these proprietary processes are built on:

• Attribution gymnastics that conveniently over-credit the channels the agency manages.

• Dashboards spun up in GA4 or Looker Studio (free tools), wrapped in a fancy name.

• Insight theater — numbers presented in pretty charts, disconnected from actual sales.

Let’s stop pretending PowerPoint is science.

So What Are You Really Paying For, Brands?

Strip away the smoke and mirrors, and here’s what that retainer is really buying:

• A renamed funnel you could find in a marketing textbook.

• A dashboard your in-house analyst could build in a week.

• Overcomplicated measurement models that inflate the agency’s value.

• Dependency — so you need them to explain your own data.

• Theater: endless decks, “status meetings,” and process over progress.

Not exactly the revolution you were promised.

What Brands Should Be Asking

Next time someone dazzles you with their “process,” ask:

1. What exactly is proprietary here?

2. If it’s a breakthrough, why isn’t the whole industry using it?

3. How many PhDs designed it, and do I get to work with them?

4. Am I paying for outcomes — or just your PowerPoints?

Why This Matters

Proprietary processes are rarely about innovation — they’re about invoices.

At MK2 Media, we don’t sell gimmicks. We sell growth:

• Transparent, replicable measurement.

• Attribution that serves your business, not our billing.

• Frameworks that empower your team, not trap them.

• Outcomes you can measure — in revenue, not just reports.

Next time you’re pitched a “proprietary process,” just ask: So what am I actually paying for?

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